Long story short: I have an extra room in the basement and I rent it out to  desperate people, students and vagabonds.  Currently it is occupied by a couple. American guy -23-, and a Japanese girl -23-.  I left my room to get a piss and heard the following as I froze in place to ease drop……

Dude:”You have ha new boyfriend?”

J-girl:”Whats dis?”

“I want to sleep.” This was followed by some assorted moaning.

“Whats dis?”

“It’s my day off…I want to sleep.”

“Whats dis??”

“iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii” just him shrieking.

“You like dis?”

“I.want.to.sleep.”

“Whats dis?”

“What are you doing? Don’t touch that.”

“Feeling good for you?”

“iiiiiiii i wanna sleep don’t touch that.”

“You day off. Whats dis?

More moaning.

“Can you pee on me?’ He asks her.

“What?”

“Please…” he enunciates each syllabub super clearly. “Pee.On.Me.”

“Can I pee to you?”

“Yes can you pee on me?”

“Can you pee on us?” She sounds confused. He laughs, moans then moans again, in what sounds like agony.

That was it. Then I went to the toilet. So who wants to move in?