Pick up Girls using the CARVER Matrix 2

“Don’t focus too much on getting with her, just focus on getting to THE NEXT STEP.” David DeAngelo

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In the first post in this series we applied the CARVER matrix on a strategic level to determine the area you should be operating in if access to the inner female sanctum is something high on your “to-do-list”. When you get serious about PUA, or anything else that really shouldn’t be something anyone “gets serious” about, then you can apply the same principles utilized by the US military and Special forces in their planning procedures.
It is important to first look at things Strategically. Once you have a concept and the broad strokes so to speak, then you break things down tactically. Although this warrants and really deserves its own independent post we haven’t that sort of time because hey, there is porno to watch and gossip to read so to broadly outline the shift from Strategic to tactical look at the following examples. Pretty please….

  • Strategically you think of a broad concept/ Tactically you focus on the day-to-day operations.
  • Strategically you consider the general direction/ Tactically you consider what vehicle you will use.
  • Strategically you wonder how things get connected/ Tactically you organize exactly what needs to be connected.

A very broad yet simple way to say this is that “Strategy looks at the what and why. Tactics look at the how.” The CARVER Matrix can be used when making decisions involving both or involving one but not the other.

So, back to our theoretical mission ”Panty Droppage” and its designation ”Gamma-2-0-Sierra-Nevada” or colloquially “Get 20-something year old Nooky” we have established our location.  Let us assume, just to speed things up that you have run various venues through the CARVER Matrix and have decided to converge upon “A971″, a fairly hip yet dully crowded business eatery/bar.  You have chosen this bar based on criteria that you defined to fit yourself considering on the type of women you will be targeting: 20 something year old office workers, yes the infamous “OL” (or money grubbers, don’t worry this mission is about subterfuge not your bank balance.)

Appropriately, you have put on a suit and tie. Nothing too dressy but enough to give you an ambiguous look.  You could be a finance guy, a teacher or a drug dealer.  You could work for the embassy or you could live with a host family. You could be homeless. You could live at an internet cafe.  There is no way to tell. The point is that you have worn the proper camouflage. Remember- you do not wear desert cammies in the Jungle.

You have further employed the use of Model based decision-making in order to determine the type of girl. Strategically, you want someone relaxed with possibly very flexible moral boundaries.  Tall would be good but not “tranny” tall and the office lady or OL vibe is really doing it for you.  Another prerequisite is that she be drinking alcohol with a pace often reserved for those dealing with a death in the family, yet not with the all-consuming passion that wraps itself around hard-core, genuine drunks.  You would like the first thing she drinks at your place in the morning to be a cup of coffee, not a left over luke-warm beer or the half-liter of Stoli she puked up the night before.

Just take our word for it on this one….just take our word.

After getting into the “vibe” and having a couple of gin tonics you spot the one.  She’s standing sort-of toward the rear of the bar that is situated in the center of the first floor, the blue glow emanating from the bar flattering, making her facial features that much soft and ultra-feminine.  She is with one friend which works well because you, being prepared and motivated, have brought a trusty wing-man along to help facilitate mission accomplishment.

The approach is simple, straight forward. Move in quickly, do not hesitate and open. You have received one casual look from her when she came in and no form of clear disgust seemed apparent.  Once you’re within speaking range, this is when you move to the tactical application of the CARVER model.

Your potential opening lines have been listed as follows:

  1. What’s your name? (eye contact, slight smile)
  2. Do you want to come to my home with me? (totally serious, sexy eyes)
  3. Sorry I’m late! (said in Japanese “Osokute Gomenne!” playful and smiling)
  4. Cheers! (glass held high “Konpai!”)
  5. God, you have a nice body baby. (looking her up and down, licking the lips….yours not hers…yet)

We are aware that these are not the only “lines” available to you however, for the sake of this post please, follow the script.  Now, let’s run these slick play-boy pros through the ever efficient and de-humanizing CARVER model.

Your opening line C A R V E R TOTAL
Opener #1 7 10 6 8 7 7 45
Opener #2 10 3 9 2 5 3 32
Opener #3 7 8 8 7 8 8 46
Opener #4 8 10 5 8 5 8 44
Opener #5 9 5 8 3 4 7 35

And the winner is….OSOKUTE GOMENE! Sorry I’m Late! with 46 points this line narrowly has passed Whats your name? and Cheers!

The rational is as follows: For overall Criticality this line is rather reserved but decent enough. You have entered the targets sphere of consciousness if you weren’t there already. If delivered properly with the right combination of humor and confidence you have shown them that you are funny, fun, have Japanese language ability and you have left things slightly ambiguous which is very good. While the two “tangos” are giggling about your silly yet effective opening line you can then follow it with Cheers! and then Whats your name?

!!TRIPLE THREAT!!

The “secret” to this line scoring high points is its moderate success in every computational component of the Matrix. Line #2 Do you want to come home with me? scores a perfect ten in Criticality making it Stupendous (yes, Stupendous) because IF this tactic is effective you will be in a taxi in 10 minutes and hopefully engaged in hot perfection love-making within the hour. However Opener #2 does not receive a high score because of very low totals in Accessibility, Vulnerability and Recognizability. It would likely be difficult to access the right combination of insanely good looks, brutal suavity and diabolical amounts of charisma in order to use this tactic. In addition, most women in the bar would not be vulnerable to such a frontal assault and finally, you have never done this before. Never before have you bathed in the sweet sexy glow of mission accomplishment via employment of this tactic. This means the tactic is unfamiliar and strange. Difficult to wield it correctly. Conversely a Cheers! or Sorry I’m Late! is something all of us have said before.

OK. I recommend you read other CARVER posts on the site to further familiarize yourself with the ins and outs of this system which is infinite in its applications and then you can take an entire Saturday afternoon calculating your assault on Japanese women-dom.

NOTE
While reading this regarding pick up in Japan, if you have never been to Japan and done this please understand there are some cultural differences that apply. Some parts of the script that work well here would result in a horrific “crash and burn” effect in a place like say “Kabul” or “San Francisco”. The actual tactics are flexible and contingent upon your area of operations.

 

Go back to part 1

 

Read more about Model Based Decision making VS your Gut and Rush Hour Drunk Girls by Gaijinass.

My esteemed colleague already talked about how the Oscars this year are a joke. I always go on how it’s not about art; the Oscars are a business, and businesses exist to make money. The more people who watch the Oscars the more money Oscars Inc makes. The way to maximize profits is to include the most popular, highest grossing, films in the nomination process. But there was one bright light in the whole pony show and that was The Cove winning best documentary. Maybe now it can get played in Nipon since the city where it takes place effectively banned the film from playing in Japan.

Reading about the Cove got me thinking about last year at the Oscars when Departures won best foreign film over the Israeli, Waltz With Bashir. I thought Bashir should have won, however Departure dealt with some big Japanese social issues, the Japanese underclass or Japanese version of the untouchables, who deal with the dead and are ostracized from society.

Then as I was reading more about the director of Departures, Yōjirō Takita, I discovered to my great amusement he used to be a big porn director making such hits as GROPER TRAIN: Search For The Black Pearl which judging from the DVD cover looks like a great “serious” flick about getting groped on the train. Then looking around it seems that a lot of Japanese directors got their start doing porn or as the Japanese call it, Pink Films (Oh how kawai). Masayuki Suo, who did the 1996 hit, Shall We Dance? first movie he was involved in was get ready … the Kanda River Pervert War . The Pervert War was also one of Kiyoshi Kurosawa’s first movies. Kurosawa went on to become a horror legend in Japan. Ahhh Japan how I love thee.

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I have to get up stupid early in order to go to work.

I get a train from my station at 0602 in order to get to Shinjuku and catch the Chuo rapid headed toward Kabe at 0633. Normally it is mildly crowded, all seats are taken, and some people are left standing. One thing that is constant however is the stone cold silence and in the early morning I am pretty certain this is something we all appreciate.

This morning however this was stolen away….I saw the culprits reach the platform almost as the train was pulling in. They went from line to line until for whatever horrid reason they stopped behind me giggling and jabbering away like school girls on crank. Two then dashed over to the Kiosk and bought “Calpis”, whatever the fuck that is, some kind of liquid in a bottle that frankly seems to have the consistency of ok…use your imagination: think “facial”, and dashed back just in the nick of time to board the train with yours truly.

I got on first and took a seat near the door. This is when I got my first good look at them. Four girls, all early twenties, 23 at most, and, had clearly been out all night and had spent that night drinking, alot. Cheaply dyed blond hair was badly frazzled and eyes were beat up and looked horribly tired. Makeup looked stale and old. Body language was slow, uncoordinated and messy and along with all of this traveled the smell of both Alcohol and something else…maybe it was Kimchi? Fried meat? Someone stepped in shit? I had no idea and I still am clueless.

Two of them plopped down on the bench next to me and the other two stumbled, then teeter tottered until they fell down onto the bench across from me. It was quite a site to behold. The train car was now full and everyone was quiet like corpses except for these four clucking and sputtering and talking like four Yakuza guys playing cards. If you have been in Japan for a while you would know what I mean. Lots of “Omae”s and “Maji Suge”s and “Fuzakena”s etc. All the while laughing it up because clearly, this was high comedy. Oddly, nobody else seemed to “get” the joke.

The girl across from me, both of them actually were dressed very similar. Both were petite and wearing heels, black tights with booty short jean cut offs over them and equally colorful and silly tops, one of them sporting a jacket that I initially thought to be a life preserver and the other wearing mid drift tan leather that could or could not be a “coat”. I think I saw a character wearing something like it in “Mad Max: Beyond thunder Dome”. High Fashion.

Both of them sat with their legs fully sprawled out and open and were gesticulating wildly recapping an event with another friend who apparently, became so drunk she passed out in a pool of her own urine, face first, after she urinated on the street, in Shibuya. Fascinating.
I was thinking “High class”.
I was thinking “My type”.
The older people on the train took turns, as if they had all worked out a schedule, giving these girls looks so full of disdain I actually checked my tie and sat up straight, my close proximity to these four putting me in the line of fire.

At Nakano station a man sitting next to the one across from me got up and de-boarded and the girl then took this opportunity to pass out and she fully did this, collapsing across the briefly open seat in dramatic, face first fashion. The old woman who had been making her move on the seat stopped in mid stride and simply did an about face and strode off. Clearly she was impressed with these examples of Japanese youth.

The three girls that were still conscious then began taking photos of the girl lying prostrate on the bench, first of her face, then taking photos of her whole profile, then the girl next to her, I swear to god: started taking photos of her crotch which was turned up facing her as she was laying on her side (not a bad back side if I might put forth this observation but…anyway). Thank god the girl, her friend, had jean shorts on. Then one of the friends on my side tossed her a “Calpis” bottle, about the size of a 20 ounce coke bottle and the one taking the crotch shots began pushing it against the girls jeans (vaginal region here folks) and they all were cackling uncontrollably and one of them was taking video with her phone and the one doing the dry humping with a bottle said in a great mockery of a dirty old man voice “Dou da? Koko ga? Kimochi desyou?” or “Hows this baby? You like it here? Feels good right?”
And at this point I finally lost my shit and began laughing.

I really tried not to but come on…this was getting way out of hand. My snicker apparently spurred the closet case Lesbo on because she got more animated, for about 30 seconds (god knows what she had planned next..sure…I was/am curious), until the passed out friend suddenly came to life covering her mouth and gesturing wildly. A friend lurched across the car and pushed a plastic bag, likely the one the “calpis” came in into her hands just in time for her to launch a very impressive flow of vomit into the bag. Not once, not twice…but three solid purging’s. Well Done.

The best part is…THEY DID NOT GET OFF THE TRAIN.

Despite what I can only describe as a heavy feeling of total and intense loathing coming from everyone, even me as the vomit smell wasn’t working for me at 0700, they stayed in their seats and got off the train one at a time as various stations came up. By the time my station arrived, the only one left was Puke bag girl, her eyes half open, her head leaning against the side board of the bench, drool leaking from her mouth like some ominous icicle and vomit on her black life preserver coat, her legs hanging as wide open as physically possible in that posture, her bag of goodies had been tied to her wrist by I’m guessing, her friend. Her friends had totally left her to “make it home safe and sound”.
With friends like….right?

I am not here to judge. God knows I have done or been witness to some of us (gaijin) doing some pretty stupid, vapid and just ignorant shit over the years….but come on….On Thursday morning????

Part of me still hopes she got home, wherever in hell that is, ok.

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The adult industry in Japan ( i.e. porn, glory hole bars, call girls, etc) is the second biggest industry in Japan. That’s right, after building cars the second biggest thing keeping the Japanese economy going is sex. Whether watching, participating, or just sucking some off, sex keeps the second largest economy in the world pumping along. With an industry this big there is bound to be some spill over in Japanese mainstream (non-sex) entertainment. Some of the most popular TV stars in Japan are former porn stars but this article is about spill overs not only into Japanese mainstream but those that go viral over the great Internet.

Panty puller

This was really big around 2004 but I still get it forwarded to me every couple of months. Like the above this is part of porn film that stages these panty attacks around Tokyo with supposedly unsuspecting women.

Panty Attack
If video isn’t loading click here

See through skirts

I see this in my inbox every couple of months; an email saying something like, “Check out the newest fashion trend, see through panties!” With some of these pictures

See through skirts

They of course are fake. As anyone who wears a skirt knows; the skirt will rotate around your body. To have the skirt lined up perfectly with the legs like shown in the pictures would take a hell of lot of coordination between the cameraman and the wearer. But with all the crazy stuff coming out of Japan people see this and accept it thinking, “only in Japan”! As usual with stuff like this you can blame porn. These images are common in cheap porno mags usually with a claim that the magazine has a, “special camera” that shoots through clothes.

Fight to the death

This video is usually titled or edited to make it appear to be a snuff film. While it is a pretty brutal fight it is actually part of a porn film by, Soft On Demand one of the biggest porn companies in Japan. The fight is part of a larger film were the loser of the fight has to … “take it” from all the guys that are half naked around the stage.

If you like this then, you should check out more from the “Myths of Japan” series:

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