Shinjuku


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“She must not get much attention around here.”

I say this looking over my shoulder at the little girl who is Japanese, maybe four or five years old and has climbed a few feet up a big tree and has turned around to look at us.

She’s posing for the camera.

We wondered into the Hanazono shrine area after a long, relaxing dinner at an Italian place near by.  It was a good dinner although the  fettuccine was a little under cooked but the peperoni ripieni was very good.  The bottle of Riesling we both shared was good too.

The street outside in Shinjuku san-chome was busy.  It’s Saturday after all and people are everywhere.  It was her idea to go to the shrine.  She told me she had noticed the festival when she was shopping, before we met for dinner, and so we went over.

The table we are at now, well, it’s just an old table and it’s yellow.  Although the festival seems legitimate it pales in comparison to the now infamous Harvest festival, held here at the same shrine in Shinjuku sandwiched between posh shopping options on one end and a notorious red light district on the other, which stretches for blocks down the street in every direction.

This festival is more standard, maybe. The festivities are contained within the actual grounds of the shrine and there is a distinct lack of well dressed hoodlums.  There are kids playing around and a woman walked by us earlier wearing an arm band that read “PTA”; her face was anxious not because of a criminal presence or an overwhelming number of off-the-clock working girls but because some boy, possibly her own, was preparing to attempt a back flip off the edge of a blood red park bench.

Bad ideas do not exist in the ten year old mind.

Now, seated here sipping a chu-hai from a typical plastic events cup, I smile at the little girl posing on the tree behind me.  She just flicks her hair out of her eyes and stares.  Her family, all the generations that make it up as far as I can tell, are busy performing some function involved with the running of this yakitori stand that we are sitting at.  A woman in her late thirties with a baby strapped to her chest is showing people where to sit and is selling cans of Asahi beer and Lemon and Grapefruit Chu-hais out of a big old cooler full of ice water.  A chubby fifteen year old boy is turning sticks of roasted chicken chunks over on an old grill.  Another woman, perhaps in her late twenties, is sitting at the old greasy fold out table next to us and is chatting with two other women, the same age, one with short dyed blonde hair and half a dozen piercings in her ear and the other with her hair tied up in a bun and wearing the kind of cheap, young fashions you’d expect to see a lot of at a carnival in Riverside California or maybe at some bowling alley in Brookline Mass.  Gaudy might not be the best word, but it’s the one that comes to mind.

The three of them are chatting away and playing with a little boy, maybe two years old, who is wearing a jinbei or little shorts and jacket set, sort of like pajamas, with a dragon emblazoned on the back.

He is playing with a red ball on the ground near the tables and he looks at me and just seems confused.

I can empathize with that feeling.  So, I look over again to where the little girl was but she’s gone now and there is just the lonely big tree.  I turn back around to the woman holding the camera and tell her again “Happy Birthday, baby.”

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Pro-Wrestling Breast Implants

“Do you mind if I drink with you while I wait for my friends? I really hate drinking alone.”

I look at her and then look around the empty bar, think about something for a moment, then I reply.

“Yeah sure, I’m outta here in twenty but feel free to pull up a stool.”

She lets out a sigh of relief and then slides off the stool, actually getting shorter as she reaches the floor; can’t be taller than one hundred and fifty centimeters max with shoulder length dyed light brown hair and a very tight top showing off her cleavage, which unless I am losing touch with things, is enhanced. Then she picks up the bag the bar provides, full of her stuff and comes over to the big round table I’m standing at in the corner under the ceiling mounted flat screen showing Rugby highlights.

She might be half Japanese, half Philippina or Latina. She might also be a prostitute.

“Well, I’m Umi, you know…like the sea.” She says and holds out a tiny hand and I shake it.

“Gaijinass.  Nice to meet you Umi. Cheers.” I say and we both pick up our respective drinks, me a double gin tonic with two wedges of lime and her’s, I think, a rum and coke. The glasses lightly clink together.

“So, yeah I hate drinking alone.  I guess I’ve been spending too much time outside of Japan. I just can’t sit in a bar alone and drink, even if I’m waiting to meet someone. Feel like a loser, you know?”

She lights a cigarette after I offer her a Cohiba club which she turns down, and I notice some tattoos on her right wrist.  I nod at them and ask her. “What’s the deal with those?”

“What do you mean?”

“No. I mean what does it say?”

Fuerza De Voluntad.” She pulls up the sleeve to her white top and holds up her wrist for me to see. Then, realizes something.  “Do you speak Spanish?”

“No. What’s it mean?”

“It means willpower.  I got it in rehab. I was in rehab. I used to have a major problem with some serious drugs, like serious ones and well, yeah anyway I got it in rehab and this one…” She pulls her sleeve up more and shows me another tattoo that appears to be a chain of beads running around her arm.

“…and this one is of Japanese beads, like, from Shinto or something?”

I pull up my sleeve and show her the beads I’m wearing.  And I ask her what she is up to tonight.

“Yeah, I’m supposed to meet my friend, a girl, and I wanted to get her to meet me here but she’s in Ginza with a client, and she’s a prostitute, not that there is anything wrong with that you know, I’m just saying…”

“Sure, yeah, no problem.”

“…but I think I’m going to meet a client of mine at seven-thirty and then meet her later. Maybe around mid night. What about you? What are you doing? You’re meeting someone right?”

I tell her that I’m meeting up with two friends here and then we are going to FACE club in Kabukichou to see another friend’s Professional Wrestling debut.

“FACE club? Yeah I know that. See actually, I do Muay Thai kickboxing and I’ve seen some friends from my gym fight there. It’s really near by.”

I tell her that’s cool and that I kickbox and I have trained people who have fought at FACE before.  She tells me about some of the fighters she knows, none of whom I recognize, and then I mention my gym and some of the people I know and she doesn’t know them either.  Then I ask her if she has ever fought.

“Me? No. I do the training fighting, with all the protective stuff on. What’s that called?”

“Sparring.”

“Yeah, sprawling, I do that.  I just do it for exercise. I mean, I will do whatever comes down the pipe: Pilates, Yoga, Muay Thai Kickboxing, Jogging or whatever.  I just like to stay fit and keep my figure which is, really, not too hard for me because of my implants. So, I just have to worry about my stomach.  It’s way easier.”

I nod knowingly.

Then I bring up what to me seems to be the only possible next question.

“Well, is that safe? What with your implants and all?”

She then cups her hands underneath her breasts and lifts up and together slightly.

“Yeah it’s totally safe.”

“Really? What if you get kicked hard in one? Is that not a problem? I would just assume…”

“No it’s totally fine. The way they are, it’s like a watermelon I guess. If you crack it, nothing comes out. They aren’t like…”

“Water balloons?”

Exactly! They aren’t like that. It’s all basically foam. So it’s really safe.”

“So, the technology is there these days?”

“Totally there.  Actually I got implants a few years ago, then got a reduction because they were too big and killing my back.”

Just then Kenji and Casey show up and I introduce them.  They each go to the bar to get drinks and Umi excuses herself and goes to the toilet.

I put another Cohiba club between my lips and light it.  The smoke is copious and a Japanese guy in a bright red T-shirt, who had been sitting behind the girl earlier, gives me a dirty look.  I just stare at him blankly for a moment and he goes back to his smart phone.

Umi comes out of the toilet and the boys come back to the table with their drinks and a refresher for me.  Then Umi, looking uncomfortable, extends her little hand to me again.

“OK guys well, I better get going to meet my friends. It was cool to meet you. Hope you have fun at the wrestling.”  I shake her hand lightly. It’s ice-cold and trembling a little.

Kenji looks at her and at me and asks, “What? You’re not going?”

I explain that I just met Umi there at the bar and she doesn’t know LionKing or me for that matter.  Casey then looks at her, and then at me and raises an eyebrow.

“Yeah I really have to get going. I mean, I totally would love to go, really, but I have to go.” She says as she reaches into the bag and grabs her coat.

I tell her it’s all good and the tickets are all reserved anyway.

“Yeah but I think I could get in if I wanted.” And she pulls on her coat and shoulders her bag.

A brief yet potently awkward moment passes between the four of us and I finally say, “Well, take it easy Umi. Have a good night. See you around.”

And she waves, smiles bizarrely and leaves the bar through the rear exit.

I turn and Casey and Kenji are both looking at me and I shrug.

Later at the wrestling event I spill a rum and coke zero all over some important documents in my bag but get home at a decent hour despite it all.

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Intense Train Experience

 

We are all going to die.

Anything, it could be a bomb, a fire, an earthquake or just a kitten on the train tracks causing the conductor to apply the emergency brake and that’s it, people die.

I’m on the Yamanote line at, I can’t see my watch but it’s about 7:40 in the morning, and this car is so packed, far beyond “capacity”, that certain doom seems to be a physical thing.  It hangs out above all our heads in the only free space left in this cattle car of death.

Doom relaxes and looks down at us snickering.

Certain Doom has a cappuccino and has lit a cigarette.

The Yamanote line services 3.7 million people per day. That’s an incredible amount and it was never designed to do this.  In a country obsessed with safety, at least on the surface, it’s clear to me, at this moment, that in fact safety takes a back seat to getting asses injected into this already absurdly filled train car.

Station hands pushing passengers into the car so the doors can slide shut; I’ve seen this before.  Station hands having to physically rip the doors open when the train arrives because there’s too much pressure against the glass inside the car; a novelty.  Tokyo keeps coming up with ways to terrify and impress me.

Both my hands are raised up, holding onto one of the steel bars cris-crossing the ceiling of the car.  Every time the train accelerates away from the previous station, my arms shake as I fight to maintain my grip.  The 80% of commuters who are holding on to nothing sway with the mass of everyone and I feel as though I’m supporting the entire weight of the car.  It’s a physical and natural force. I’m reminded of the ocean.

I detest commuters that don’t hold on.

As the train reaches it’s cruising speed, the weight shifts off of me and I can breath again.  I can’t move, at all, but I can breath.  I look down and in front of me, pressed into me, is a girl. She must be fourteen years old and she’s wearing a dark blue sailor suit and has a black leather school bag draped over a shoulder.  The top of her head reaches up to my chest.

The train rocks and rolls and continues it’s journey.

The girl in front of me slowly lays her head on my chest.  She doesn’t look up at me but she only lays her head slowly on my chest and even if I wanted to, there would be no way for me to push her off.

Another station, Takadanobaba; Station staff tear the door open, people spew forth.  People get packed on.  Positions shift slightly.  I can see the young girl now, still in front of me, literally cheek to cheek due to the angles, with a sixty year old business man who is the same height as her and he’s deeply tanned with distinguished white hair and a dated but impeccably maintained dark blue suit that matches the girls school uniform.

What is it like to be this man?  How many times has he ridden this train? How many office meetings has he gone to? How many times has he yelled at his wife or caressed his child’s hair late at night, in the dark?  How many affairs has he had and when was the last time he was on this train and smiling, talking to a woman that smiled back at him?

And what’s it like growing up on these trains?  I see children everyday in the crowd.  Just little kids.  What’s it like being an year old girl crushed  between bodies that are connected to faces you can’t even see?  What does it do to her when she finally realizes that the man was pushing himself against her in a strange way?  Does she realize? 

Who was that man anyway and where did his life go?

At Shinjuku, finally, and the doors are pulled open by the sentinels and a mass exodus occurs.  People come streaming forward shuffling in baby steps onto a platform clogged with other people.  Nobody is really moving.  The speaker system is repeating commands to stay calm and move slowly and to clear the stairs but the stairs are solidly blocked with people just standing there, waiting to come onto the platform.

A woman two bodies in front of me gets pushed and loses her balance.  She falls, catching herself in a very awkward position, one hand on the ground, the other clutching her bag, her ass in the air.  She seems unable to get up and everyone is bumping her and shuffling and people are becoming mean.

People are losing their disguises.

I shove someone out of the way and reach the woman just at the top of the stairs and I simply, from behind, wrap my right arm around her waist and lift her up, carrying her down the stairs with me one little step at a time.  She’s very light, not much more than the weight of a child. Her body feels tiny and useless, like there is no core to speak of; nothing solid. I can’t imagine existing this way but something tells me that she doesn’t wake up at night in cold sweats after long conversations with dead people.

At the bottom I set her down on her own feet and she looks at me for only a moment and her eyes are red from tears that were filling and she’s in her late 20′s and an utter wallflower. She says “Argatou Gozaimasu. Sumimasen Deshita.” As if it was her fault she couldn’t survive in the mosh pit with the angry salary men and nihilistic 17 year old high school boys and the jaded construction workers and the drunk party girls going home and the foreigner.  So, I just walk away from her and pass by the long full line of people waiting to get onto the Yamanote line.

I notice then as I climb the Chuo line stairs toward the platform that it’s largely empty and nobody seems to be around.

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“If these guys make a move, we have to take them down…and then run.”

Yamato said this to me as I stared at his eyes, or the place his eyes would have been had he not been wearing those sunglasses and I tried to figure out if he was bullshitting me because as always, his ever-present smile was wide open and the festival was completely packed with people.  Women and men, old and young. Office workers and spouses, hookers and thugs.  Hanazono Shrine had done it again and the “Torinoichi” festival was alive.  People flowed through the lanes of stalls and vendors finally arriving at the massive red and gold shrine that sat at the top of the steps like a heart, pumping blood rhythmically through the body.

“Are you serious?” I asked him.  Again searching his mask of a face for some indication of what exactly I had walked into.

“Of course I’m fucking serious.  Look, just be cool, like before, and don’t jump unless I do,” he said as he turned away and walked into the brightly lit pavilion.  The smell of grilled meat, beer and cigarettes engulfed me and as I saw the table we were inevitably going towards, I considered just walking away from this.  I don’t do this anymore.  I don’t know you people anymore and it’s better like that.  I can just walk away and it won’t matter.

Then I nearly laughed out loud realizing the slick bastard still had my phone in his hand. Ten minutes earlier “Hey let me use your phone my battery is dying,” he had said.  He had spotted me in the crowd and I had been genuinly happy to see  him.  I had to admit Yamato looked well.  Very slick dark blue suit, pink collared shirt with the top open and mid length black hair slicked back.  He and I joked and caught up as the people streamed by us in the crowd and stared hard at us, dressed like hit-men out of their respective countries B-movies. So sure, happy to see my former boxing coach, friend and trouble maker so why not- I passed him my phone.

Well played Yamato.

In the tent approaching the table in the next instant I felt my chest expand and my muscles flush with juice as my adrenaline slowly started to build.  Out of the entire group at this table we approached, the three potential problems were clear enough.

The tent we had gone into was one of the many erected on the grounds within the shrine for the festival.  This one in particular was a tent selling beer, shochu, grilled beef and chicken and fried noodles.  About 14 long folding tables were set up inside the tent behind the grills and coolers for drinks and at the farthest table in the back right hand corner were 13 people.  This is the table I followed Yamato to.

We got the attention of  everyone seated immediately.  8 men and 5 women.  Five of the men were older, easily in their sixties with gray or black loose-fitting suits and oddly colorful cashmere scarves around their necks.  Each one of them had salt and pepper hair, tightly slicked back over their heads and to a man they all wore very dark hued Gucci or Prada sunglasses with gold frames.  These men turned to look at us, first Yamato, then me, then back to Yamato, but none of them stood.  They remained seated and slowly sipped their beers and sake while watching us make our way past the other tables and chairs and laughing bodies of people having a celebratory style Friday night.

The three men that did stand up as we neared the table were not older, but younger than both myself and Yamato.  Mid 20′s as far as I could tell.  All three of them slighter in build but with a taught smoothness that reminded me of big cats.  All three of them wore jet-black suits and white shirts with large collars, opened up wide so I could see shiny gold and silver medallions, the slim tightness of athletic collar bones and chest muscles and then, just where the shirts started, the colorful patterns of tattoos that I knew ran off their pecs, to their shoulders and down the arms and backs of these men who had already proven themselves in numerous fist fights, beat downs and likely prison time.  They had already earned the spot here, with the bosses and were trusted to do what needed to be done when the time came and the way they stood to meet us was not one conveying welcome, but was one filled with hostility.

These guys were the reason Yamato had tricked me into walking over here with him.  Kindness can in fact, be a weakness.  Particularly when you deal with men that spend their lives walking the tight rope.

Yamato bowed when we reached the table.  I stood two paces behind him and one pace off to the left so that I could see everyone.  This position also put me within equal distances of all three of the bodyguards.  The one closest to Yamato began to snarl at him before the older man sitting in front of him raised his hand for silence.  He then greeted Yamato, almost warmly,  mumbling in that very distinct way that these men communicate when they are older.  Yamato kept bowing, very deeply, showing his respect for the mans position and they conversed quietly for about a minute.

I stood there, both hands folded in front of me and looked at everyone without looking directly at anyone.  Noted where I was in relation to everyone else.  Asked myself some questions: “Can I jump over the table to hit that guy with this women sitting there? She’s sort of in the way,” and “Can I get this folding chair up in the air without it getting caught on something?” then “If we have to burn the hell out of here, do I go right to the nearest exit or left into the crowd?”

Nobody at the table, including the women all of whom were in their 30′s and pretty, said anything.  Then somehow and rather suddenly, between the two of them, things were settled and Yamato stood up straight to his full height, at least as tall as me so about 6’3 and nearly as broad across in the shoulders, and he looked directly at the younger man who had tried to start a problem with him and suddenly broke into a big smile and jokingly told him in a booming voice “You need to relax son! Here, let me get you a drink!”

The table laughed, except for the three bodyguards, still standing and Yamato raised a hand for a waiter.  At this the young soldier, clearly offended and in possession of some beef with Yamato, tried to push past a folding chair to stand directly in front of us.  I instinctively moved up a pace to be between Yamato’s back and the bodyguard on our left who then slowly reached one hand up to his shirt collar and pulled it open showing off a large tattoo of a bright red Cherry Blossom with a Dragon dancing around it emblazoned on his chest.  He did this and leaned his head back giving me his best menacing, wide-eyed “Fuck OFF I’m connected,” look.

I know this game though, have played it once or twice before and what you learn quick is that the only thing you can’t do, ever, is back down.  That’s what gets a folding chair crashed across your face.  Weakness incites a predators malice.  So I cocked my head to the side slightly then pulled up the sleeve of my black suit jacket enough for him to see the beginnings of the ink on my right forearm.  Then I blinked slowly a few times and shrugged my shoulders….”So What?” being the message.

I have no doubt now that these three young gangsters would have tried very hard to beat the living shit out of Yamato and I had their Boss, two of them actually, not told them to “Sit the fuck down it’s all finished now,” because men like them, living that lifestyle don’t care.  It’s what they do. I know this from before.  That having been said, between Yamato and myself we probably weighed as much as all three of them.  Also, between the two of us we have over a hundred fights in the ring, I have been in and out of that over the years, the ring and the cage, and Yamato was at one point a Light-Heavy weight boxing Champion who I know from experience has very fast hands and hits like a freight train. Aside from that, both of us had done these types of dances before.  It’s not something I want in my life now, but to some degree at least, once you’ve been there, you can’t forget what you know.

The math in my head said they couldn’t have been armed with anything beyond a small knife, a gun would be out of the question here with all the police and people, and there were loads of easily improvised weapons at the ready on all sides.  Shit, I can give a man a concussion with a magazine if that’s what I happen to have. It would be embarrassing to get your teeth knocked out with a rolled up edition of “Elle”.

Finally, Yamato and I weren’t playing king of the mountain I knew now; he had to squash a beef with this old guy and only needed things to be cool long enough for him to have his say.  He tricked my overly kind-to-friends-ass into backing him up hoping my presence would keep things copacetic by throwing everyone off-balance; massive white guy, dressed like he is going to a funeral with the black suit, white collared shirt and black tie, black wrist watch and a few silver rings. If it went south, we would cause enough damage to give ourselves a few seconds and then be gone into the waves of people.

What’s more is that he knows me, and knows about me and has seen some things.  He knew that I wouldn’t go with him if he asked plainly because I don’t do that anymore, but he knew if he got me there, I would know what to do, when to do it and when to go wheels up and flee if necessary.

By the time I meandered back to my friends across the shrine at another stall, maybe ten minutes had gone by but my hands were shaking heavily from the adrenaline dumping out of my system and I did the mental math realizing how bad that could have been.  A few beers down the hatch (courtesy of Yosomono who was lining them up) and the atmosphere of the festival and all was good.

Until he called me back. “What the hell? Get your friends and come drink with us! Yeah bring everyone and don’t forget the blond girl.”

I can tell you this much, when you drink with these people, no matter what you drink, eat, order or do; nobody expects you to pay.  They don’t even bother asking.

Later on, after many beers, loads of sake and a train of gangsters, hostesses, pimps, boxers and even a monk had come and gone Yamato pulled me aside and in his fashion, still wearing the sunglasses and smiling, slightly hunched over vaguely resembling a Japanese gangstered out John Wayne he said by way of thanks, his arm around my shoulders, “OK.  Tonight was lucky.  I got the drinks next time…but that was fun though right?”

Fun?  No.  Memorable? Oh yes.

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